with Dr. Ellyn Bader
Tune in for an interview with the founder of modern couples therapy, Ellyn Bader, also a founder of the Developmental Model and The Couples Institute. Ellyn was one of the first therapists to focus on romantic adult relationships in therapy, rather than on the individual or the total family dynamic. Since then, she has continued to be a leader in the field of relationship health and couples counseling for over 30 years.
In this interview, you’ll learn about the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy and how you can use it to make your relationships deep, loving, and long lasting. You’ll also learn John and Ellyn’s thoughts on relationship as a path of growth. We managed to keep the amount of jargon to a minimum, so you can enjoy this episode even if you are not a therapist!
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“We see healthy, evolving couples relationships as having the potential to move through a series of developmental stages. And when couples are able to do that, they keep their relationships alive and vital. But too many couples get stuck and we see them getting stuck at the very first stage.” – Ellyn Bader
- The pushback that Ellyn received when she introduced couples therapy to the field of psychology
- The Developmental Model of Couples Therapy
- Why differentiation and individuation are essential to the health of long-term relationships
- How individuation can create problems when a couple is not yet good at differentiation
- Tips for how you can deepen differentiation and individuation in your relationship
- How relationship is a powerful path of growth
- Why working on your relationship makes the world a better place
“Couples therapy is not just good for the relationship, it’s awesome for the individuals in the relationship because what better path of personal growth than to have to learn how to reconcile these different perspectives, habits, and qualities that are sometimes uncomfortable for us.” – John Howard
- Get a copy of Tell Me No Lies by by Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson
- Read In Quest of the Mythical Mate by Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson
- Get the Return To Eden study guide
- Connect with Ellyn:
Twitter | The Couples Institute
“Be curious instead of furious—because it is curiosity that enables us to dig deeper, either into ourselves or our partners.” – Ellyn Bader